ies dinner. Jacob continued to
snore, getting louder. I turned up the TV.

I was strangely relaxed, almost sleepy, too. This house felt safer than my own, probably because no one
had ever come looking for me here. I curled up on the sofa and thought about taking a nap myself.
Maybe I would have, but Jacobs snoring was impossible to tune out. So, instead of sleeping, I let my
mind wander.
 Finals were done, and most of them had been a cakewalk. Calculus, the one exception, was behind me,
pass or fail. My high school education was over. And I didnt really know how I felt about that. I
couldnt look at it objectively, tied up as it was with my human life being over.

I wondered how long Edward planned to use this not because youre scared excuse. I was going to
have to put my foot down sometime.

 If I were thinking practically, I knew it made more sense to ask Carlisle to change me the second I made
it through the graduation line. Forks was becoming nearly as dangerous as a war zone. No, Forkswas a
war zone. Not to mention . . . it would be a good excuse to miss the graduation party. I smiled to myself
as I thought of that most trivial of reasons for changing. Silly . . . yet still compelling.

But Edward was right  I wasnt quite ready yet.

 And I didnt want to be practical. I wanted Edward to be the one. It wasnt a rational desire. I was sure
that  about two seconds after someone actually bit me and the venom started burning through my veins
 I really wouldnt care anymore who had done it. So it shouldnt make a difference.

 It was hard to define, even to myself, why it mattered. There was just something about him being the one
to make the choice  to want to keep me enough that he wouldnt just allow me to be changed, he
would act to keep me. It was childish, but I liked the idea thathis lips would be the last good thing I
would feel. Even more embarrassingly, something I would never say aloud, I wantedhis venom to poison
my system. It would make me belong to him in a tangible, quantifiable way.

 But I knew he was going to stick to his marriage scheme like glue  because a delay was what he was
clearly after and it was working so far. I tried to imagine telling my parents that I was getting married this
summer. Telling Angela and Ben and Mike. I couldnt. I couldnt think of the words to say. It would be
easier to tell them I was becoming a vampire. And I was sure that at least my mother  were I to tell her
every detail of the truth  would be more strenuously opposed to me getting married than to me a
becoming vampire. I grimaced to myself as I imagined her horrified expression.

 Then, for just a second, I saw that same odd vision of Edward and me on a porch swing, wearing
clothes from another kind of world. A world where it would surprise no one if I wore his ring on my
finger. A simpler place, where love was defined in simpler ways. One plus one equals two. . . .

Jacob snorted and rolled to his side. His arm swung off the back of the couch and pinned me against his
body.

Holy crow, but he was heavy! Andhot. It was sweltering after just a few seconds.

 I tried to slide out from under his arm without waking him, but I had to shove a little bit, and when his
arm fell off me, his eyes snapped open. He jumped to his feet, looking around anxiously.

What? What? he asked, disoriented.

Its just me, Jake. Sorry I woke you.

He turned to look at me, blinking and confused. Bella?

Hey, sleepy.
Oh, man! Did I fall asleep? Im sorry! How long was I out?

A few Emerils. I lost count.

He flopped back on the couch next to me. Wow. Sorry about that, really.

I patted his hair, trying to smooth the wild disarray. Dont feel bad. Im glad you got some sleep.

He yawned and stretched. Im useless these days. No wonder Billys always gone. Im so boring.

Youre fine, I assured him.

Ugh, lets go outside. I need to walk around or Ill pass out again.

 Jake, go back to sleep. Im good. Ill call Edward to come pick me up. I patted my pockets as I
spoke, and realized they were empty. Shoot, Ill have to borrow your phone. I think I must have left his
in the car. I started to unfold myself.

No! Jacob insisted, grabbing my hand. No, stay. You hardly ever make it down. I cant believe I
wasted all this time.

 He pulled me off the couch as he spoke, and then led the way outside, ducking his head as he passed
under the doorframe. It had gotten much cooler while Jacob slept; the air was unseasonably cold 
there must be a storm on the way. It felt like February, not May.

The wintry air seemed to make Jacob more alert. He paced back and forth in front of the house for a
minute, dragging me along with him.

Im an idiot, he muttered to himself.

Whats the matter, Jake? So you fell asleep. I shrugged.

I wanted to talk to you. I cant believe this.

Talk to me now, I said.

Jacob met my eyes for a second, and then looked away quickly toward the trees. It almost looked like
he was blushing, but it was hard to tell with his dark skin.

I suddenly remembered what Edward had said when he dropped me off  that Jacob would tell me
whatever he was shouting in his head. I started gnawing on my lip.

 Look, Jacob said. I was planning to do this a little bit differently. He laughed, and it sounded like he
was laughing at himself. Smoother, he added. I was going to work up to it, but  and he looked at
the clouds, dimmer as the afternoon progressed  Im out of time to work.

He laughed again, nervous. We were still pacing slowly.

What are you talking about? I demanded.
 He took a deep breath. I want to tell you something. And you already know it . . . but I think I should
say it out loud anyway. Just so theres never any confusion on the subject.

I planted my feet, and he came to a stop. I took my hand away and folded my arms across my chest. I
was suddenly sure that I didnt want to know what he was building up to.

Jacobs eyebrows pulled down, throwing his deep-set eyes into shadow. They were pitch black as they
bored into mine.

Im in love with you, Bella, Jacob said in a strong, sure voice. Bella, I love you. And I want you to
pick me instead of him. I know you dont feel that way, but I need the truth out there so that you know
your options. I wouldnt want a miscommunication to stand in our way.



15. WAGER

 ISTARED AT HIM FOR A LONG MINUTE, SPEECHLESS. I could not think of one thing to say to
him.

As he watched my dumbfounded expression, the seriousness left his face.

Okay, he said, grinning. Thats all.

 Jake  It felt like there was something big sticking in my throat. I tried to clear the obstruction. I
cant  I mean I dont . . . I have to go.

I turned, but he grabbed my shoulders and spun me around.

No, wait. Iknow that, Bella. But, look, answer me this, all right? Do you want me to go away and
never see you again? Be honest.

 It was hard to concentrate on his question, so it took a minute to answer. No, I dont want that, I
finally admitted.

Jacob grinned again. See.

But I dont want you around for the same reason that you want me around, I objected.

Tell me exactly why you want me around, then.

I thought carefully. I miss you when youre not there. When youre happy, I qualified carefully, it
makes me happy. But I could say the same thing about Charlie, Jacob. Youre family. I love you, but Im
notin love with you.

He nodded, unruffled. But you do want me around.

Yes. I sighed. He was impossible to discourage.

Then Ill stick around.
Youre a glutton for punishment, I grumbled.

Yep. He stroked the tips of his fingers across my right cheek. I slapped his hand away.

Do you think you could behave yourself a little better, at least? I asked, irritated.

 No, I dont. You decide, Bella. You can have me the way I am  bad behavior included  or not at
all.

I stared at him, frustrated. Thats mean.

So are you.

That pulled me up short, and I took an involuntary step back. He was right. If I wasnt mean  and
greedy, too  I would tell him I didnt want to be friends and walk away. It was wrong to try to keep
my friend when that would hurt him. I didnt know what I was doing here, but I was suddenly sure that it
wasnt good.

Youre right, I whispered.

He laughed. I forgive you. Just try not to gettoo mad at me. Because I recently decided that Im not
giving up. There really is something irresistible about a lost cause.

Jacob. I stared into his dark eyes, trying to make him take me seriously. I lovehim, Jacob. Hes my
whole life.

You love me, too, he reminded me. He held up his hand when I started to protest. Not the same
way, I know. But hes not your whole life, either. Not anymore. Maybe he was once, but he left. And
now hes just going to have to deal with the consequence of that choice me. 

I shook my head. Youre impossible.

 Suddenly, he was serious. He took my chin in his hand, holding it firmly so that I couldnt look away
from his intent gaze.

Until your heart stops beating, Bella, he said. Ill be here  fighting. Dont forget that you have
options.

I dont want options, I disagreed, trying to yank my chin free unsuccessfully. And my heartbeats are
numbered, Jacob. The time is almost gone.

His eyes narrowed. All the more reason to fight  fight harder now, while I can, he whispered.

He still had my chin  his fingers holding too tight, till it hurt  and I saw the resolve form abruptly in
his eyes.

N  I started to object, but it was too late.

 His lips crushed mine, stopping my protest. He kissed me angrily, roughly, his other hand gripping tight
around the back of my neck, making escape impossible. I shoved against his chest with all my strength,
but he didnt even seem to notice. His mouth was soft, despite the anger, his lips molding to mine in a
warm, unfamiliar way.

 I grabbed at his face, trying to push it away, failing again. He seemed to notice this time, though, and it
aggravated him. His lips forced mine open, and I could feel his hot breath in my mouth.

Acting on instinct, I let my hands drop to my side, and shut down. I opened my eyes and didnt fight,
didnt feel . . . just waited for him to stop.

 It worked. The anger seemed to evaporate, and he pulled back to look at me. He pressed his lips softly
to mine again, once, twice . . . a third time. I pretended I was a statue and waited.

Finally, he let go of my face and leaned away.

Are you done now? I asked in an expressionless voice.

Yes, he sighed. He started to smile, closing his eyes.

 I pulled my arm back and then let it snap forward, punching him in the mouth with as much power as I
could force out of my body.

There was a crunching sound.

 Ow!OW!  I screamed, frantically hopping up and down in agony while I clutched my hand to my chest.
It was broken, I could feel it.

Jacob stared at me in shock. Are you all right?

No, dammit!You broke my hand! 

Bella,you broke your hand. Now stop dancing around and let me look at it.

Dont touch me! Im going home right now!

Ill get my car, he said calmly. He wasnt even rubbing his jaw like they did in the movies. How
pathetic.

No, thanks, I hissed. Id rather walk. I turned toward the road. It was only a few miles to the
border. As soon as I got away from him, Alice would see me. Shed send somebody to pick me up.

Just let me drive you home, Jacob insisted. Unbelievably, he had the nerve to wrap his arm around my
waist.

I jerked away from him.

Fine! I growled. Do!I cant wait to see what Edward does to you! I hope he snaps your neck, you
pushy, obnoxious, moronic DOG!

 Jacob rolled his eyes. He walked me to the passenger side of his car and helped me in. When he got in
the drivers side, he was whistling.

Didnt I hurt you at all? I asked, furious and annoyed.
Are you kidding? If you hadnt started screaming, I might not have figured out that you were trying to
punch me. I may not be made out of stone, but Im notthat soft.

I hate you, Jacob Black.

Thats good. Hate is a passionate emotion.

Ill give you passionate, I muttered under my breath. Murder, the ultimate crime of passion.

Oh, cmon, he said, all cheery and looking like he was about to start whistling again. That had to be
better than kissing a rock.

Not even remotely close, I told him coldly.

He pursed his lips. You could just be saying that.

But Im not.

 That seemed to bother him for a second, but then he perked up. Youre just mad. I dont have any
experience with this kind of thing, but I thought it was pretty incredible myself.

Ugh, I groaned.

Youre going to think about it tonight. When he thinks youre asleep, youll be thinking about your
options.

If I think about you tonight, it will be because Im having anightmare. 

 He slowed the car to a crawl, turning to stare at me with his dark eyes wide and earnest. Just think
about how it could be, Bella, he urged in a soft, eager voice. You wouldnt have to change anything for
me. You know Charlie would be happy if you picked me. I could protect you just as well as your
vampire can  maybe better. And I would make you happy, Bella. Theres so much I could give you
that he cant. Ill bet he couldnt even kiss you like that  because he would hurt you. I would never,
never hurt you, Bella.

I held up my injured hand.

He sighed. That wasnt my fault. You should have known better.

Jacob, I cantbe happy without him.

 Youve never tried, he disagreed. When he left, you spent all your energy holding on to him. You
could be happy if you let go. You could be happy with me.

I dont want to be happy with anyone but him, I insisted.

Youll never be able to be as sure of him as you are of me. He left you once, he could do it again.

No, he will not, I said through my teeth. The pain of the memory bit into me like the lash of a whip. It
made me want to hurt him back. You left me once, I reminded him in a cold voice, thinking of the
weeks hed hidden from me, the words hed said to me in the woods beside his home. . . .

 I never did, he argued hotly. They told me I couldnt tell you  that it wasnt safefor you if we were
together. But I never left, never! I used to run around your house at night  like I do now. Just making
sure you were okay.

I wasnt about to let him make me feel bad for him now.

Take me home. My hand hurts.

He sighed, and started driving at a normal speed, watching the road.

Just think about it, Bella.

No, I said stubbornly.

You will. Tonight. And Ill be thinking about you while youre thinking about me.

Like I said, a nightmare.

He grinned over at me. You kissed me back.

I gasped, unthinkingly balling my hands up into fists again, hissing when my broken hand reacted.

Are you okay? he asked.

I didnot. 

I think I can tell the difference.

 Obviously you cant  that was not kissing back, that was trying to get you the hell off of me, you
idiot. 

He laughed a low, throaty laugh. Touchy. Almostoverly defensive, I would say.

 I took a deep breath. There was no point in arguing with him; he would twist anything I said. I
concentrated on my hand, trying to stretch out my fingers, to ascertain where the broken parts were.
Sharp pains stabbed along my knuckles. I groaned.

Im really sorry about your hand, Jacob said, sounding almost sincere. Next time you want to hit me,
use a baseball bat or a crowbar, okay?

Dont think Ill forget that, I muttered.

I didnt realize where we were going until we were on my road.

Why are you taking me here? I demanded.

He looked at me blankly. I thought you said you were going home?

Ugh. I guess you cant take me to Edwards house, can you? I ground my teeth in frustration.
Pain twisted across his face, and I could see that this affected him more than anything else Id said.

This is your home, Bella, he said quietly.

Yes, but do any doctors live here? I asked, holding up my hand again.

Oh. He thought about that for a minute. Ill take you to the hospital. Or Charlie can.

I dont want to go to the hospital. Its embarrassing and unnecessary.

 He let the Rabbit idle in front of the house, deliberating with an unsure expression. Charlies cruiser was
in the driveway.

I sighed. Go home, Jacob.

 I climbed out of the car awkwardly, heading for the house. The engine cut off behind me, and I was less
surprised than annoyed to find Jacob beside me again.

What are you going to do? he asked.

I am going to get some ice on my hand, and then I am going to call Edward and tell him to come and
get me and take me to Carlisle so that he can fix my hand. Then, if youre still here, I am going to go hunt
up a crowbar.

He didnt answer. He opened the front door and held it for me.

We walked silently past the front room where Charlie was lying on the sofa.

Hey, kids, he said, sitting forward. Nice to seeyou here, Jake.

Hey, Charlie, Jacob answered casually, pausing. I stalked on to the kitchen.

Whats wrong with her? Charlie wondered.

 She thinks she broke her hand, I heard Jacob tell him. I went to the freezer and pulled out a tray of ice
cubes.

 How did she do that? As my father, I thought Charlie ought to sound a bit less amused and a bit more
concerned.

Jacob laughed. She hit me.

 Charlie laughed, too, and I scowled while I beat the tray against the edge of the sink. The ice scattered
inside the basin, and I grabbed a handful with my good hand and wrapped the cubes in the dishcloth on
the counter.

Why did she hit you?

Because I kissed her, Jacob said, unashamed.
Good for you, kid, Charlie congratulated him.

I ground my teeth and went for the phone. I dialed Edwards cell.

 Bella? he answered on the first ring. He sounded more than relieved  he was delighted. I could hear
the Volvos engine in the background; he was already in the car  that was good. You left the phone . .
. Im sorry, did Jacob drive you home?

Yes, I grumbled. Will you come and get me, please?

Im on my way, he said at once. Whats wrong?

I want Carlisle to look at my hand. I think its broken.

 It had gone quiet in the front room, and I wondered when Jacob would bolt. I smiled a grim smile,
imagining his discomfort.

What happened? Edward demanded, his voice going flat.

I punched Jacob, I admitted.

Good, Edward said bleakly. Though Im sorry youre hurt.

I laughed once, because he sounded as pleased as Charlie had.

I wish Id hurthim.  I sighed in frustration. I didnt do any damage at all.

I can fix that, he offered.

I was hoping you would say that.

There was a slight pause. That doesnt sound like you, he said, wary now. What did hedo ?

He kissed me, I growled.

All I heard on the other end of the line was the sound of an engine accelerating.

In the other room, Charlie spoke again. Maybe you ought to take off, Jake, he suggested.

I think Ill hang out here, if you dont mind.

Your funeral, Charlie muttered.

Is the dog still there? Edward finally spoke again.

Yes.

Im around the corner, he said darkly, and the line disconnected.

As I hung up the phone, smiling, I heard the sound of his car racing down the street. The brakes
protested loudly as he slammed to a stop out front. I went to get the door.
Hows your hand? Charlie asked as I walked by. Charlie looked uncomfortable. Jacob lolled next to
him on the sofa, perfectly at ease.

I lifted the ice pack to show it off. Its swelling.

Maybe you should pick on people your own size, Charlie suggested.

Maybe, I agreed. I walked on to open the door. Edward was waiting.

Let me see, he murmured.

 He examined my hand gently, so carefully that it caused me no pain at all. His hands were almost as cold
as the ice, and they felt good against my skin.

 I think youre right about the break, he said. Im proud of you. You must have put some force behind
this.

As much as I have. I sighed. Not enough, apparently.

He kissed my hand softly. Ill take care of it, he promised. And then he called, Jacob, his voice still
quiet and even.

Now, now, Charlie cautioned.

I heard Charlie heave himself off of the sofa. Jacob got to the hall first, and much more quietly, but
Charlie was not far behind him. Jacobs expression was alert and eager.

I dont want any fighting, do you understand? Charlie looked only at Edward when he spoke. I can
go put my badge on if that makes my request more official.

That wont be necessary, Edward said in a restrained tone.

Why dont you arrest me, Dad? I suggested. Im the one throwing punches.

Charlie raised an eyebrow. Do you want to press charges, Jake?

No. Jacob grinned, incorrigible. Ill take the trade any day.

Edward grimaced.

Dad, dont you have a baseball bat somewhere in your room? I want to borrow it for a minute.

Charlie looked at me evenly. Enough, Bella.

 Lets go have Carlisle look at your hand before you wind up in a jail cell, Edward said. He put his arm
around me and pulled me toward the door.

 Fine, I said, leaning against him. I wasnt so angry anymore, now that Edward was with me. I felt
comforted, and my hand didnt bother me as much.
We were walking down the sidewalk when I heard Charlie whispering anxiously behind me.

What are you doing? Are you crazy?

Give me a minute, Charlie, Jacob answered. Dont worry, Ill be right back.

 I looked back and Jacob was following us, stopping to close the door in Charlies surprised and uneasy
face.

 Edward ignored him at first, leading me to the car. He helped me inside, shut the door, and then turned
to face Jacob on the sidewalk.

I leaned anxiously through the open window. Charlie was visible in the house, peeking through the
drapes in the front room.

Jacobs stance was casual, his arms folded across his chest, but the muscles in his jaw were tight.

Edward spoke in a voice so peaceful and gentle that it made the words strangely more threatening. Im
not going to kill you now, because it would upset Bella.

Hmph, I grumbled.

Edward turned slightly to throw me a quick smile. His face was still calm. It would bother you in the
morning, he said, brushing his fingers across my cheek.

 Then he turned back to Jacob. But if you ever bring her back damaged again  and I dont care
whose fault it is; I dont care if she merely trips, or if a meteor falls out of the sky and hits her in the head
 if you return her to me in less than the perfect condition that I left her in, you will be running with three
legs. Do you understand that, mongrel?

Jacob rolled his eyes.

Whos going back? I muttered.

Edward continued as if he hadnt heard me. And if you ever kiss her again, Iwill break your jaw for
her, he promised, his voice still gentle and velvet and deadly.

What if she wants me to? Jacob drawled, arrogant.

Hah! I snorted.

 If thats what she wants, then I wont object. Edward shrugged, untroubled. You might want to wait
for her tosay it, rather than trust your interpretation of body language  but its your face.

Jacob grinned.

You wish, I grumbled.

Yes, he does, Edward murmured.

Well, if youre done rummaging through my head, Jacob said with a thick edge of annoyance, why
dont you go take care of her hand?

 One more thing, Edward said slowly. Ill be fighting for her, too. You should know that. Im not
taking anything for granted, and Ill be fighting twice as hard as you will.

Good, Jacob growled. Its no fun beating someone who forfeits.

 Sheis mine. Edwards low voice was suddenly dark, not as composed as before. I didnt say I would
fight fair.

Neither did I.

Best of luck.

Jacob nodded. Yes, may the bestman win.

That sounds about right . . . pup.

Jacob grimaced briefly, then he composed his face and leaned around Edward to smile at me. I
glowered back.

I hope your hand feels better soon. Im really sorry youre hurt.

Childishly, I turned my face away from him.

I didnt look up again as Edward walked around the car and climbed into the drivers side, so I didnt
know if Jacob went back into the house or continued to stand there, watching me.

How do you feel? Edward asked as we drove away.

Irritated.

He chuckled. I meant your hand.

I shrugged. Ive had worse.

True, he agreed, and frowned.

 Edward drove around the house to the garage. Emmett and Rosalie were there, Rosalies perfect legs,
recognizable even sheathed in jeans, were sticking out from under the bottom of Emmetts huge Jeep.
Emmett was sitting beside her, one hand reached under the Jeep toward her. It took me a moment to
realize that he was acting as the jack.

 Emmett watched curiously as Edward helped me carefully out of the car. His eyes zeroed in on the hand
I cradled against my chest.

Emmett grinned. Fall